Blog writing is hard

...when you are exhausted.  I visit my blog daily and am painfully aware that I have not been blogging much lately.  Truth be told, I am just so tired that I cannot think of anything to write about...  never mind actually write about it.  Everything is more difficult when tired.

So just a little update.  That's all I have in me for now because I need to save some of my energy today to get off my butt and clean my house.

My oldest son is officially graduated.  I am giddy with anticipation about his future (although my excitedness has been squashed by... you guessed it, exhaustion) .  I have high hopes for him.  Always have.  We got to meet his girlfriend and I have to say, I really like her.

We went to Hershey park for the very first time and it was fun.  It is never easy to take two toddlers to theme parks but this park has quite a few rides for little ones and they are old enough to really enjoy them.  It always makes my day to see them laugh.  It was hot and I thought we might get rained right out of the park but luckily the rain only lasted long enough to make it super humid and freakishly hot.  I also cannot stand utterly expensive food and drinks are in places like that.  I mean, $3.00 for a 16 oz soda???  It is like they are on Mars and they have to pay extra to get soda there.  I have always been a little bullshit over this topic. It should be called what it is, highway robbery.  I took juice boxes for the kids (there was 6 of them with us) and when the guard checked my bag she said "How many juice boxes are you bringing???"  Yeah, enough so that I don't go broke making sure my kids get a drink.  There are no water fountains there.  Not that it bothers me though, they gross me out.  My never-completely-happy side comes out when I am tired so just read this last paragraph as "We had the time of our lives at Hershey Park and I would recommend going to everyone, just bring lots of juice or lots of money".

I was looking forward to making a trip to Dollywood over the 4th of July weekend but I have changed my mind.  Maybe next year when I have had time to recover from the other trip.  We don't normally go out for fireworks on the 4th because I hate to think of all of the idiots who are drinking and driving.  I don't know, maybe we will this year.  Maybe we won't.

I have been working on some little people aprons.  Here is one...

There are a couple more but she love that one and has been wearing it since I finished it.  If you are interested in purchasing one, I will have some on etsy soon or you can just drop me a line at dianelynn2004 (at) msn (dot) com.

I decided that I was done with long hair.  While we were away on vacation and after our day at Hershey Park, I decided I was done.  I have been tossing around the idea for a while but I was scared to do it.  My hair was getting pretty long and I really did like it... sorta.  So, I have gone from this

to this

or even this

I don't know why I didn't do it sooner!  I LOVE it.  I am so happy to not have to wash, dry and curl all of that hair I had before!  It is so simple now and I can still put it in a ponytail if I want.

Okay, so that is my little update.  Hopefully I will get back to blogging soon.  Don't give up on me just yet.

To Dillon

Dillon, I can hardly believe that you will be graduating in just a few days. The past 18 and a half years have just gone by so quickly. It seems like you just made your arrival into this world and now you are taking your last walk as a senior. I remember when you were little. You were a mommas boy. We spent all of our time together. I was never left unentertained with you around. Such a sweet and smart little boy. I didn't imagine that there would ever be anything that would hold you back in this world. I, of course, thought I had the smartest boy EVER. I was such a proud mom.

As you grew older I began to realize that teens are difficult. You were no exception to the rule. I really had no idea how hard you were going to make it though. I had no idea. Words fail me. We don't need to bring it all back up but I was scared for you. I was scared for all of us. When I realized that big trouble had arrived at our doorstep, I was devastated. I began to worry about the future. Then I had to do the one thing I hadn't thought I would have to do for a few more years. I had to let you go. I hadn't thought I would have to do that so soon. It was by far the worst time of my life although I was thankful that your absence from my life was not permanent (if you are following me).

Fast forward to present.
You made it! I am now once again feeling that pride I once felt before. I pray that the hurt and dissappointment are things of the past. I pray that as you take your final walk that you realize that the future is yours. You are the captain of your vessel and the decisions you make are yours to own. I will always be here for you. I will always love you beyond measure. I know I will be crying my eyes out on Wednesday night but it will be tears of joy. Congratulations, Dillon. I love you with all of my heart.

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This post is for my sister

Her name is Melissa and she is 4 years younger than me.  I was born on her due date and she was born on mine.  She is my only sister that shares both parents in common with me (no brothers).  We do have other siblings as well though.  I sure do love her.  I don't get to see her as much as I would like.  We are only one state away but it is still a 10 hour-turned-16 hour drive for me with the little ones.  We tried to move back to her state but it didn't pan out and honestly, the longer it takes, the more and more I don't see it happening.  I know that is not what she wants to hear.  It's not what I want to believe but we are becoming accustomed to being here and there are things we love about being here.  I love my sons preschool and the babies music class.  Emily loves her school and her dance class.  Up until just recently though, I was ready to get the heck out of here.  A recent change of hands with my husbands job though has made me really think that we are probably going to be here for a while so I may as well just get used to it.  That thought, all by itself, is really, really, really hard for me.  I will be 39 next month and I have never lived anywhere for more than 4 years IN MY LIFE.  We have been here for nearly 3 and a half years now.  I. am. itching.  So, I think I will just sell my house and move across town.  It should scratch my itch enough to allow another 3 or 4 years to pass.

In the meantime though, I REALLY miss my sister.  I miss you, girl.  I wish we could have lunch together and cookouts...  girls night out and some therapeutic shopping.  I dream about hanging out at your house with your annoying cute little doggy.  Emily begging me to take her to your house and Owen crying when we have to go home.  Disney world and the water park.  I don't have a sister here.  Great, now I need a tissue.  It is really hard to think too much about the reality of this situation.  That is my defense mechanism... I just don't think too much about things that bother me.

So anyhow, I hope you know how much I love you and miss you.  I am really sad that I won't be seeing you this week although I do understand.  Thats all I have.  I wish we lived closer.  I wish my kids were more a part of your life and we had time to spend together.  Maybe one of these days.  Just maybe.

blog

Hello world.  My very first post about my sewing (and other crafty) adventures.  I must say, I didn't know I had it in me to sew.  A few years back I decided we needed to make a couple of pillows for our oldest daughters bed.  I needed something specific and didn't want to search the stores for what I needed.  When we took the sewing machine out...  I was lost.  The machine had been given to us by a neighbor.  After several attempts at trying to thread the darn thing, my HUSBAND had to come show me how to do it.  Then he had to sew the pillows.  I seriously had no idea what to do.
Fast forward to this year.  I had to have surgery which resulted in a little bit of downtime for me.  Downtime is really non existent in my life given that I have a 2 and 3 year old.  So during my downtime, I decided to fill some of it with crocheting.  I love to crochet, but again, time doesn't often lend itself to something that I like to do. When I was getting around a little better I decided to go to a Hancock store and proceeded to spend SEVERAL hours walking around and looking.  after my adventures, I wondered into the area with the sewing machines.  A woman (employee) was there sewing a little girls dress.  I struck up a conversation and she explained to me HOW EASY this dress was that she was making.  It really did look easy.  I thought to myself, "Self, if it is that easy, then for sure you can do it".  I was on a mission.  
I went home and took out the sewing machine (same one from years ago).  Oh... and I bought fabric while I was at Hancock too.  I was THAT sure I could do what she was doing.  For days I tried to do it.  For days I thought I must really be a moron.  I mean really, a complete idiot.  I told my husband that it must be the machine.  It was given to us, after all.  Maybe it was broken and she just decided to give it to us...  "Eh, just give it to Diane, she's a fricken idiot, she will never know".  It. must. be. the. machine.  I cannot possibly be THAT stupid.  So, for Mother's Day, the love of my life bought me a new, unbroken, fancy schmancy bee-utiful sewing machine.  I could not wait to get it home.  I could not wait to prove that it was the other machines fault that I could not sew.  I probably don't have to say any more.  I'm not going to.  You already know the punch line.  Operator.
I have however been able to make some nice things.  I have not mastered the skill that I was longing to.  One of these days.  In the mean time though, I have been having fun making a few dresses.  

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